Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Free Me From the Free Books

Dear Amazon,

I love my Kindle.
I love my Kindle Books app, and I love that I can read books on my Kindle, my iPad, and on my phone.
Oh, and on my computer too.
It's great that you can feed my obsession for books anywhere I go.
But please, could you stop marketing free Kindle books?
Already my Kindle is maxed out with books, and I fear that my seemingly unlimited Kindle Cloud space is soon going to be overflowing.
Which means no more room.
Which means no new books.
I love that I can find some truly wonderful gems amidst the truly awful free books that you provide, but enough is enough.
Last week I downloaded 40 free books.
FORTY!!!
In one day!
It took me about 10 minutes!!
Help me!
I can't stop!
If those were actual books my house would be packed with books collecting dust (instead of virtual dust).
If those were library books I'd have them stacked up all over!
What you are doing is feeding my hoarding obsession for books, and you are allowing me to continue downloading free books - You know that I don't know when to stop!
Please don't say it's my responsibility to discipline my downloading.
Please.
You and I have been acquainted for over 10 years - yes, since your internet inception - and I know that you have my complete purchase history thus making you intimately familiar with my over spending.
So stop with the free books.
Put a block on my account.
Do something - but please save me from myself!
I beg of you.

Sincerely,
The woman who wishes that she were retired so she could actually read all 325 books downloaded onto her Kindle (and that doesn't include the Kindle Cloud Reader count)

P.S. Could you also stop sneaking in books that cost money in the middle of my downloading free books spree? Already this week you've cost me an unintentionally spent $3.99. You owe me dudes.

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